Thursday, 21 August 2014

Well you can bump and grind if it's good for your mind

Still coping with the gloom after our fab Amsterdam trip, even a short working week such as this and a Bank Holiday weekend to come cannot lift the spirits.

Time for a light musical interlude, methinks...

How about James Last and his Orchestra with their truly faboo Hawkwind-T-Rex-Alice-Cooper medley?

Ah, that's better!


Routine fire drills have been condemned for making workers think the place they hate most will be destroyed.

Experts described false fire alarms as ‘inhumane’.

Psychologist Nikki Hollis said: “It’s like giving a cat a massive herring then yanking it away on a piece of string, laughing sadistically while pretending it was a necessary test of the cat’s reflexes.”

Office manager Stephen Malley said: “Whenever the fire alarm goes off there is a wave of euphoria, with team members cheering and deliberately tipping their desks over.

“Last week that turned to a chant of ‘Burn! Burn! Burn!’ and some of the audit team began to empty out their cigarette lighters on a pile on tax return folders.

“However, after half an hour of standing around in the car park while the office fire warden yelled incomprehensibly, staff were ordered to return to their office.

“We were absolutely devastated once it dawned on us that we’d have to return to our dull cube-based lives.”

Call centre operative Roy Hobbs said: “I remember as a kid being promised a Big Trak for Christmas but instead my dad went to prison. That’s what fire drills are like.”

Boss Stephen Malley said: “There is actually no legal obligation to do fire drills. We just like to fuck with their heads.”
The Daily Mash.

Of course.

Wednesday, 20 August 2014

Guilty feet have got no rhythm

Another timeslip moment, dear reader, and one very close to my heart.

This time thirty years ago, I was on a little weekend trip to Bath (Georgian idyll) with a female friend. Having drunk all afternoon (some things never change), we retired for a "siesta" before the evening jollities (separate rooms, needless to say). I had, however, spotted earlier that day at the bus station kiosk a certain type of magazine that had intrigued little closeted moi...

And so it came to pass that I sneaked out of that hotel and purchased my very first gay wank mag publication Vulcan - and (ahem) the rest is history!

The music playing - or rather, being sung very loudly by a raucous group of young ladies passing the hotel window - on that auspicious occasion?

George Michael's Careless Whisper (the Number 1 hit in the charts this week in 1984)...

Ah, memories.

Tuesday, 19 August 2014

While we were away...

...we missed Our Glorious Leader's birthday!

Many happy returns, Madonna...

[From Charlie Hides TV. Of course.]

Monday, 18 August 2014


We're back, sweeties!

Much refreshed (if somewhat weary from burning the candle at both ends from Thursday night almost to the last moments before departing for Schiphol on Sunday evening) by the joys of Europe's most beautiful party city Amsterdam, I haven't (despite only having just returned to London after our overnight stay with the Essex Boyz) forgotten it is still a Tacky Music Monday.

So, in keeping with our current obsession with all things Dutch, what could possibly tackier than a special appearance at one of the extravagantly camp stadium-filling concerts by the marvellous De Toppers of the top Dutch girl-band of the 70s, Luv?

Enjoy the show (especially their entrance with zimmer frames!)...

De Toppers

Luv' on Wikipedia

Thursday, 14 August 2014

Dat is mooier dan Parijs

By time you read this, dear hearts, we shall be in the throes of travel to our most beloved of all cities (London aside) - AMSTERDAM!

I will be sure to bring you all back a tasteful present such as the above.

Meanwhile, here's the only song to play for such an occasion. Take it away, Johnny Jordaan!

Geef mij maar Amsterdam, indeed!

[Back Monday!]

Wednesday, 13 August 2014

Music catch-up, final part(y)

The third (and final; for now) of my little musical "catch-ups" is all about dance - and in particular, the work of one man: Mr Dave Audé!

You can keep your Avicii, your Pharrell, Calvin Harris and Tiesto, this man is consistently the most uplifting of all the "remixers-du-jour". And here are just a few examples from the summer of 2014 of his work, that have made me smile and shake my booty (admittedly somewhat wheezily these days)...

London Rose - Kick Drum:

Robyn and Royksopp - Do It Again:

Andy Bell - Aftermath (Here We Go):

He even made Edina Menzel's Disney schmaltz-fest Let It Go sound good:

And, finally, his collaboration with a lady who I only name-checked yesterday - the lovely Luciana and You Only Talk In #HASHTAG:

That's got me in the mood for a party - in Amsterdam!

Dave Audé official website